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Thinking about my own identity brings up all sorts of questions around the ‘I’ that I’m referring to. People talk about the ego, like some sort of internal narcissist who’s always clamouring for attention and walking all over what’s left of our ‘self’. Is that ego the ‘me’ I think I am? I’m certainly trying to recognise my ego when he pops up. Modern life seems to be created solely for the ego.

In the past, our antecedents would have struggled to know their own faces (other than reflections in water). I wonder how they identified with the ‘I’?

When you stare into water – especially natural water: ponds, rivers, lakes, that have life inside them – your physical body/shape becomes comprised of the water itself. The world is in reverse. The sky is down, the shadow is physical, the water is solid and the depth of the water body IS your own body. 

This transmutation of the idea of the physical body that can occur just by looking over water is – to me – deeply spiritual. It opens up further questions such as ‘Who is the observer?’, ‘Who is the I that is looking?’, ‘Which is the real me?’

As I’m beginning my journey, some of these questions will flow in and out of my noticing (like water).

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I am a Wiltshire-based landscape artist, working outdoors, come rain or shine. I recently left full time work in order to pursue my life-long ambition of being an artist.

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